'Tis the Season

   The count down is on... Christmas in 5 days!!  It is such a busy time of year with all the chaotic of preparing for this special day. Getting the presents, traveling, parties, cooking and the list goes on. I will have to admit I just love all the craziness that comes with it. It is one of my favorite holidays to be with those you love most and to celebrate the true meaning of Christmas the birth of Jesus. It is so easy to get caught up in all that "stuff" we have to do for Christmas that we forget the true meaning of what it is really about. For me it's a good time to get out of myself and give to others that may not be able to have a Christmas. The feeling you get when you do something for someone without anything in return is just amazing. I ask God on a daily basis to help me to do his will and to thank him for all the blessings I have received from him.

  This is also a holiday that can be very stressful if you have a hearing loss. Trying to hear the sales clerk when Christmas music is blaring from the speakers. Going to a party and having trouble hearing with all the background noise. Having to make a phone call about an order you may have placed and having to ask the person to repeat what they are saying. This is a good time to ask for help or explain to the person that I am talking to that I am deaf. This is not always easy especially when I am in my poor me attitude I would isolate and miss out on everything. I have learned though self discovery that I had to accept and love myself for who I am in order for me to be comfortable to acknowledge my deafness. Most of the time it is never a problem for people to accommodate my needs and to the people that gave me a hard time I just prayed for them. You never know what someone is going through unless you walk in their shoes that is why I try to be kind and understanding to people I interact with. The acceptance of who I am has led me to believe in myself that I can do anything if I put my mind to it and ask god for help. I am so very grateful to be on this path that god had put in front of me it is not always easy but, its very rewarding.


 This holiday hug your loved ones longer tell them how much they mean to you. Do something kind for someone and not let them know about it. Help someone or a family in need this year for Christmas. Most importantly thank god for all of your blessings you have received. Wishing all of you a very blessed holiday!! Merry Christmas!



 

The Sky's The Limit

 Over the last few weeks I have discovered that there are so many helpful resources out there for the deaf and hard of hearing people. I have found support groups and websites that have given me valuable information on how to help me achieve more out of life. I have found better ways to handle the phone, to enjoy going to the movies, and how to ask for help when I need it. I had a lot of fear about not being able to accomplish things because of my deafness. I was afraid to try something out of my comfort zone that might challenge me. I always had fear of the unknown and the fear of I am not good enough.

  I took a giant leap of faith when I decided to get the cochlear implant. This was a huge change that I knew was going to have big impact in my life. I am so grateful before I choose this path that I renewed my faith in god. I do believe that my faith has helped me in so many ways on this journey that I am on. I have learned about acceptance, patience, compassion and to trust god. To trust him that I will always be cared for and loved by him. It is up to me to do the footwork that I need to do to get that guidance. I know that when I fall he is there to pick me back up and try all over again. There are times when I know what the blessings of being deaf are. To be able to enjoy silence and see the beauty around me and to be able to teach my children anything is possible no matter what your limits are.

  I am learning that the sky's the limit for me now. It's a big world out there with so many opportunities for me now that I ever thought possible. There are always going to be challenges for me but, I have learned anything is possible with god.

A funfilled weekend

 I received an invitation to go to a HLAA (Hearing Loss Association of America) Christmas party over the weekend and what an amazing time that was! It was really neat to meet people with all types of hearing losses and how they manage in the hearing world. To be able to relate with someone who goes through the same difficulties as I do it  is such a relief to know that I am not alone. I sometimes forget how difficult somethings can be when I am doing everything I can to function like a hearing person. I get frustrated when I can't make a simple phone call or when I can't hear what someone is saying. It feels so good to get support from other people who understand how you feel. They made me and my family feel so welcome! They are all such an inspiration to me I am so truly blessed to have met them.
 
 Also last week I got remapped with a new program for my cochlear implant. They added some more deeper tones and it's an adjustment. Sometimes really deep sounds can be very jumbled but, as the days have moved on its getting better. It is always a surprise when I go and get readjusted.  I never know what I might be hearing differently or what new sounds I may hear. I am getting better with talking to someone in a noisy room.  I have a remote that can actually help  fade out some of those background noises. Its a really neat little tool that I have.  I am an avid lipreader and I am trying to turn myself away from the person to try to hear what they are saying. A lot of work for me but, with help from the Harry Potter book CD's I am practicing with my listening. I love Harry Potter books and I will be working my way up the Twilight books on CD's next. I am getting really good hearing the British Accent I just LOVE they way they speak!

To end my great weekend I was able to go out with some great friends and see what dance club music sounded like. It was hard to hear the words but,  I did enjoy feeling the beat under my feet out on the dance floor. One nice advantage that I still have is turning my device down or turning it off if its too much sound for me. It was a great weekend of exploring new sounds and meeting inspiring people!

A New Beginning

 I have decided to start blogging about my journey on what i am experiencing in life with a cochlear implant. It has only been two weeks since I have had my implant turned on but, I have discovered so much in that short of time. It is a journey that has taught me to have faith in god and be grateful for all I have. To appreciate all the small things that life has to offer.
  I can still remember what that day was like when they first turned on my implant. I was nervous and scared but, deep down inside I knew god had me in his care. If he got me this far he will help me get through the rest of this. The first sound I heard was a beep and it was the clearest beep i have heard! I was getting very excited to see what the next process was. Sure enough as all the mapping was done it was time to see what i could hear. When my audiologist ask me what i was hearing and to hear my response back to her was just amazing!! I never heard my voice so clear with all the different pitches. My hearing aids compressed sound so much that I was missing so much sound.  There are no words to really describe that moment it was just amazing and I felt so blessed to have received this gift.
  When I got to hear my children's voices after I had my implant turned on I just had tears of joy! I was able to recognize the differences in their voices not unlike my hearing aid that made them sound the same. I never realized how noisy it is to eat! The clatter of the silverware and the sound it makes when it touches the plate. I have also realized i am a noisy eater with the chewing of food and smacking of the lips! I had to get used to the new sounds the car was making. I never knew I had a safety feature on my van that beeped when my trunk was opening. I got to enjoy hearing the crackle and snaps the fireplace makes I just love hearing that!  The Harley still sounded as good as ever!!!! Nice to be able to put a helmet on without feedback I used to get from my hearing aid. Hearing music was very different on the radio than a cd or a live band. I am getting better with the radio as I have been practicing listening. I have been using Bon Jovi Wanted Dead or Alive lyrics and song to practice listening to the words and hearing the music. The band at my church sounds just amazing! Hearing the changes in the drums and figuring out what instrument is playing is all new to me. I still have challenges with it but, I love challenge just makes me try harder. So many new sounds in the world that I know!
  My cochlear implant does not give me normal hearing I will always be deaf. It is mechanical but, I have gotten used to that and it is not so noticeable anymore. It does give me a more enjoyable life and to hear the clarity of sounds in a lot of ranges. It is one of the best decisions that i ever made to get this implant done. I could not of done it without help from my family, friends and god. I am excited more than ever to go out into this world to explore and to see what god has in store for me!